Welcome to the somewhat unbalanced mind of Orbson Rice.

Friday, October 14, 2011

Orbson Rises Again + Juicy Squirts

Greetings and salutations Orbsonites. This weary traveler has finally made his way home and is anxious and eager to regale you with my many rants and ramblings. I have spent a great deal of time this week reviewing the news I missed and researching future Orbson Oracle entries. Next week you’ll be reading my take on everything from bank fees to skydiving sexcapades (I am SOOOO in favor of this). The Orbson Oracle is 50 entries old and is gaining more interest than I could have predicted this soon. As I prepare for the next 50 entries, I thought I would share a few random Juicy Squirts:


Occupy Wall Street: Finally, people are beginning to take to the streets in protest. What do they want? Who cares, at least they are not conservative teabaggers…. Okay, my excitement is over. Now you need to actually demand something concrete. Better yet, start spending that energy putting the right people into office. I appreciate the noise but it’s time to get behind a plan.

Obama’s Job Plan: A reputable poll shows that the vast majority of Americans like this plan. So what does the Senate do? They vote NO. Look, you can call this plan a stimulus if you would like, I don’t care. I just listen to non-partisan economists who agree that this plan is needed. This vote just proves that the people in office don’t care about the people they represent. It is time for a publicly funded election process. More on this idea soon.

iPhone 4S: Just call the thing iPhone5. Not enough new features? Then wait until you can create something better. Either way, I am getting tired of the numbered versions; I think it is time to get creative “iPhone-F.U.Android”.

Fall TV: I am loving both 2 Broke Girls and of course The Big Bang Theory. It is nice to see that over the top sex jokes are making their way onto primetime.

Work of Art Next Great Artist: This Bravo show is probably my favorite right now. This is also a great inspiration for my “Literary Art”. If you have not seen the show, check it out. This week’s theme had the artists taking “tacky” art and elevating it to “fine art”. My take? I would have taken the “tacky” painting and hung it up as is. However, I would have created (if I had any talent) an intricately carved frame that brought out some of the character of the piece. In addition, I would have carved phrases such as “All art is beautiful to someone” “You call this tacky, I call you a pompous prick.” Essentially, it would be a big “FU” to the judges who came up with the challenge. Still, the frame would have been bitchin’.

Detroit Lions 5-0: My Lions are 5-0. I am seriously concerned that something is wrong in the universe. However, since I prefer my universe to be a little off anyway, I’ll just sit back and enjoy. Go Lions!

Ghostbusters: Ghostbusters is back in the theaters. Great movie but come on, where is the new material. If Hollywood were a woman, she would need some serious lubricant because creatively, she is all dried up.

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